Answered by Jamie, Hiring Expert at Worthington Industries, on Monday, August 31, 2015
Great questions and kudos to you for trying to resolve it. It really depends on your working relationship and the issue that you're having. Here are my suggestions:
1) Start with the FACTS that you have observed (seen and/or heard)
2) Make sure you're not telling yourself a story about the situation
3) Ask yourself what you want long-term out of the situation and conversation
4) Create a safe environment by asking the person if they have time to talk about something that is bothering you/on your mind.
5) Tell your story as a story and ask for clarification - i.e. Jamie, the last 3 times I've asked you to provide me your piece of the project, you committed to the deadline however you did not provide me the information until after the assignment was due. This makes me feel you don't care about the project or the impacts in may be having on me and my team. Can you help me understand what is going on?
I am a certified trainer in Vital Smarts Crucial Conversations. They have amazing tips & tricks on their website that could help if you are interested. https://www.vitalsmarts.com/